Tidakkah Anda???

Utter loneliness… Quietness… Boredom… What a gloomy life.

Don’t you miss that feeling of missing that special someone?
Don’t you feel that life has not been treating you well?
Don’t you ever think some people are just mean to you?

Don’t think too hard. It’ll just screw up your membrane and left you numb.

Life is just IS.

Cheers,
Anak Pak Sidik.

Suhana Sidik sebagai emcee berjaya. Well Done!

I have survived the endurance test. I have managed to become an emcee for a session with MD. It was tough, but I manage to outlive the day unharm.

It is a day I can be proud of. I might not be the best emcee, they might not call me for a comeback, but at least, I can talk about the experience. I’ve done it! I even threw in 2 of my own question/comment while I was at it. Gila kuasa betul la.

So freaking pissed. Iperintis still haven’t resolved my problem. Dey… I need to check my email la. Dah 3 hari dah ni. Poyo sungguh mereka ini.

Keluhan Hati Orang Yang Sakit Hati

Aku sungguh tension sekali. Komputerku sudah dua hari tidak boleh digunakan. Mengapakah orang Iperintis sungguh lembap, aku pun tidak tahu. Mungkin mereka makan gaji buta semata-mata.

So pissed rite now. You are supposed to cool off during Ramadhan, stop the swearing and berzikir every now and then. I guess Wong would laugh me off and tell me that he's controlling his temper way better than I do… while fasting! Well, stupid Iperintis people haven't come yet to fix my freaking computer. I can't check email, or do proper work just because I don't have the proper tools to operate.

How hard would it be for them to get more lazy bum to work on our computers? Don’t they have KPI to maintain? How long before one person request can be entertain? Why are we paying them again?

Came to think of it, this is P*******! We don’t fire people because it’s atrocious to do so. It’s ok to pay less to the employee because we are semi-government and this is our way of giving back to the country. Come on. This country won’t freaking survive without us. I was at first disappointed when they announce bonus, then I thought, they were pretty smart to give it away during Ramadhan. “Sesungguhnya aku bersyukur dengan apa yang kuterima”, eventhough we have surpass the performance of last year, AND wait, did you say they get more last year? Where is the justice to all this.

Be thankful. I am, don’t get me wrong. But sometimes, it just triggers you. I was an engineer by study, am a planner by profession. What is my future? Most of my engineer friends were thinking of leaving the company after five valuable years of experience and work in Middle East to earn way more than what our company is offering. Should I go back to doing engineering and do the same justice?

How can P******* appreciate the staff? No salary increment or extra bonus in the picture. Na’ah. More benefit? Yeah, that could be it. Other companies are catching up fast. Better promotion? Yeah, no more seniority rules :p

From getting pissed to talking about P*******. See how sick my mind is. I need a holliday badly…..

Cepat la betulkan komputer ini.

Selamat Harijadi to You... Happy Birthday Untuk Awak

This blog is dedicated to a good friend of mine who just turned 25 today. Happy Birthday girl.

This girl is adored by those who knew her. Maybe because of her smooth grace, or her dazzling style that people find appealing. She who makes you glances twice to catch that sweet reflection. Ok, being so gay right now. Felt like wanted to dedicate this blog to her, for all that she’s done to me. She is a friend when I needed one, a friend when I felt lonely, a good friend indeed!

I guess it was destined why I remain single, maybe so that I meet other single people to rock with! Hehe.. But I guess it’s just odd why SHE remain single where plentiful boys out there who would kill to be liked by her. Clock ticking. You’re 25 now girl! Don’t be too picky and too choosy.
Those moments we had:

This is us during Planner Forum. Its like paparazi-celeb photo. Class...

Aku rasa sungguh ayu pada waktu ini. Hehe..

Ini kami lagi...

Anyway, Happy Birthday! I wish you all the best. Muah.....

Satu Lagi Crappy Entry

So, the dilemma ends there.

I can tell you for a certain now that IMN is no longer in the picture. But I wish him all the best with this girl whom I adore. I think they would make a good couple, or are they already.. Hehehe, the sore loser ME.

Anyway, yesterday, was out with Ja and Aima in Shroom for bukak puasa. I had to drag them since I actually had a date with this Indo dude, and was actually quite shy to just go out the two of us. (Can you believe that.. me.. shy.. :p) It turns out that he couldn’t make it cause he overslept, and Suraya also cancelled dinner cause her bf was too shy to join us. Men.. why are they such complicated creature?
Ed join us later with her bf. He reminded me so much of Veddervader and got me thinking hard. Could he be the one that got away? Was I just plain ignorant? Am I mean to do those things I did to him? Stupid stupid me…

My life has not been very interesting lately. Since it’s been budget cycle, I got stuck with pile of endless works. But it went well in the end. I managed to present to CMC and received good credit. At least I didn’t humiliate myself in front of DD, and at least the job is still on the table. I wish I can make my mark in this new position now. Don’t get me wrong, I do like what I’m doing now, it’s just that sometimes people around me complicate things. You would start feeling that they look down upon you, or disregard you just because you are new. ‘Masih hingusan’ la katakan…

I can tell you now that I’ve been feeling very down lately. The big BLW.
1. B……. The other day, my phone went off. Oh, it’s his birthday! I still can’t get over the fat that I got dumped. But, I was never angry at him. I guess I am just not that kind of person. I felt pissed sometimes. I used to over-work to get over this feeling of loneliness. Now, I am just too plain tired.
2. L…….. What is wrong with me? Not attractive enough? I don’t have great personality? The heck with it!
3. W……. I need to change job ASAP or I’ll be stuck here K

End here… Will stop posting this entire annoying story about me and my sad life story in the future. Again, a brand new muah (for how many times already)…
Suhana Sidik.

Status update: Aku kini di Dubai

Yeah yeah... I'm in Dubai rite now.

My trip to Sudan isn't as smooth as what we have planned. There was a windshield crack at the plane from Singapore, so our flight had to be postponed till 8 hours later. The great benefits of being in Business Class is that you have the chance to be treated like royalty. All your queries answered rite away. I guess spending the nite in Singapore wasn't so bad as we were given hotel rooms to sleep off the worries.

The trip to Dubai was marvellous. I had the luxury of first class upgrade! Plenty of food and freebies along with it. Our interconnecting flight from Dubai-Bahrain-Khartoum then had to be re-scheduled, and we had to spend an extra night in a 5 star hotel in Dubai. Another stamp on my passport! Me and Pokji somehow got lost in the city, spending most our time in the taxi chatting with the taxi driver. Interesting really to see the incredible architecture of the city. But the ghastly weather was too much even for me to wield.

I am now stuck in Dubai business lounge waiting to board the flight to Khartoum. Boredom struck. Tell you guys more update later.

ps 1: IMN called me on Saturday before my flight... yeah call, instead of the usual lame SMS. "Take care", he said. What the.... Why is he so nice to me? Guys..... So unpredictable. And Daisy, secret still yeah. Hehehe...

ps 2: PA to DD... Cam jadi aje. Went for interview with him on Friday, and he has already introduced me to other people as his PA. Ok... freaky.. Anyway, Pokji think it's a good move for me to join DD as long as there is proper replacement for my me in SP.... wicked.

Kerja yang begitu memberangsangkan

So, yesterday, Zana and Nadiah approached me and offered me an interesting position. Madi has earlier told me over lunch, but I acted surprise anyway.

There's an opening for the position of PA cum planner for the new DD, and they wanted to know whether I am interested in taking up the post. Me, out of all people! I'm freaking fresh from the oven (ok, one year in service already) and I am just holding up a seeding position. Am I qualified enough to serve for a Senior General Manager in the company?

I was uncertain. Reluctant to make any definite answer there and then and ask to come back to them. Would he trust me to deliver above expectation with the insignificant experience I have?

So, DD came up to our floor just now and ask who 'Suhana' is. I timidly answer, 'Saya'. His gaze lock at me, as mine to his. Eye to eye... 'We'll meet up later'. Argh....

I guess it's a good learning experience as he is willing to teach and share his wisdom & knowledge. Just a question of how patient he is, and how much more effort I am willing to put to succeed. Just as my life about to settle down, and I was beginning to enjoy life more, this opportunity came. Work would be more hectic.

So tell me.. tell me please... Is it wise, is it right for me to take up this post? Heck, I might not even get chosen after his small chat later on. Or, my boss won't freaking let me go!

Ok.. Go for it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.... Or not....

PGL Was Superb

Love is in the air…. Nomore.

I’m such a bad friend. I missed going to two weddings on Sunday on purpose because I don’t have a partner to go with. I ignore Veddervader completely when he asked whether I want to hang out. And I was too lazy to call up a friend to ask how she was doing. Overall.. total sucker.

Karma..

Yesterday, was trying to get a friend to go with me to watch Puteri Gunung Ledang. Been asking him for two days already and in the end, got ditch. Where are all your boyfriends when you needed them.

I can actually go alone and watch the show. It’ll be like the old days when I go watch movie, or the philharmonic enjoying the symphony… ALONE. Just that, I lack the confidence of driving after the accident. Hence, I can’t gather the courage to live life on my own thus far. I used to drive to Shah Alam ever week, sometimes twice a week out of boredom, but can’t get my lazy ass to do that anymore. Pure stupidity.

So yesterday, nak tak nak, had to ask IMN out (hehe). I need to state for a fact that he is the last person I want to go out with and I am not kidding. But yeah, in a situation like this.. yeah. So anyway, he said yes (my lucky day since he’s only available Tuesday and Thursday this week). I had to treat him for dinner anyway since I lost the World Cup bet.

Had to rush down from office just in time to meet him. I couldn’t be late this time! Need to prove to him that I am no workaholic and I can still live a proper life without working too much @#%w$er@#$.

So anyway, we went out for proper dinner. I made a fool out of myself when I used the wrong knife for steak and ordered a well-done steak that was over-cooked (that’s what well-done is Suhana!). It’s been a while since I last ordered a steak so my table manner was not too compelling. And we got into the argument about what a date really is. I really don’t think that it was a date. Friends hanging out after work is definitely not a date, right! He, who has not been a date (or so he claimed), got confused. And on and on we went. But I couldn’t resist bila dia suap the chocolate cake to me. Argh.. Hehe.. Nothing la. Saja2 aje kitorang buat lawak.

And after that, we went for the play. Since we were early, had the chance to stand in the lobby watching people making grand entry to Istana Budaya. No one caught his interest, likewise, so I guess it was a good start already.

Ok.. PGL… Straight to the point.

The show was superb. The prop was excellent, Gusti Adipati stole the show, Stephen really know how to sing!@!!, and not to forget the marvelous Tiara! Adlin could do better. I guess I expected him to do much better (I have a secret crush on him. Don’t tell him just yet). I was amazed to see the overall coordination of the dance and the play. IMN was constantly trying to seek the best position to doze off, and I kept disturbing him trying to make him stay awake.

The show finished rather late, past my bedtime! Luckily, I was still in shape to drive. Oh, did I told you that IMN freaking love Indonesian girls! Good skin tone, very bold.. definitely wife material. And there I was with mouth wide open. What the… And during dinner he told me ‘workaholic’ aint hot. So, I definitely am not? “No comment”

Guys.. Workaholic not hot ke? I guess I am fairly happy with the fact that I got a merit 2 for PPA since I’ve been working like hell lately. But then again, if I have no life, what is there to enjoy?